The Worst Thing You Can Say to a Client

If an employee at Chick-fil-A were to say, “You’re welcome,” instead of, “My pleasure,” I’m sure management would talk with the team member, and expectations would be set or reset as needed.

If the words spoken at a fast-food joint have an impact, the language you choose in your practice is even more critical. I’ve heard several things advisors (and team members!) tell clients in their practice that should never be spoken.

Your language either delivers massive value or it damages the relationship. Regarding client communications, there’s no such thing as neutral ground.

Don’t squash client enthusiasm

The entire reason your clients hire you is to help them reach their goals. Every communication you have should revolve around guiding your clients toward the next steps they should take. If your clients can’t act, you waste everyone’s time.

An old saying that “your words make you rich” implies that everything you say to your clients can make all the difference.

Let’s say a client came to you wanting to take a ton of money out of their portfolio. This client is dangerously close to their guardrails.

Your gut reaction will be to tell the client that they can’t take any money – but take a deep breath and pause.

As an advisor, the worst thing you could tell a client is that they have a “bad idea.”

When you squash a client’s enthusiasm like this, you create a negative environment that limits your clients and crushes dialog before it ever has a chance to happen.

You must create an open environment where clients feel comfortable coming to you. Have empathy for your clients who had to muster up the courage to open up to you and share their questions.

They are already afraid of feeling stupid or ruining things.

Let’s not shut them down before we hear them.

Your new go-to reaction needs to be, “Oh, wow! That sounds exciting! Please tell me more about what you want to do.”

Sometimes, a client’s idea of “a lot of money” is only a thousand dollars, which is doable.

But you may have a client who wants to take out $2 million to buy 40 timeshares in the Bahamas so they can rake in so much money they’ll be able to retire tomorrow.

No matter where your client falls in this spectrum, approach their ideas with genuine curiosity. When my client is very excited about something, I’m excited about helping them achieve that.

Too many advisors miss this when it comes to working with clients : It's not our job to tell the client they must do what we say. It’s their money, their life savings, and ultimately, they can do what they want.

I don’t care where my client’s great ideas come from. My job is to help them see if these ideas align with their goals. If the idea helps my client reach their goals, let’s run with it. If the idea doesn’t, then we need to do some reevaluating.

Don’t jump to conclusions

Recently, a client came in asking about their RMD for this year. I could have blurted out the answer that their RMD is $53,867.

But I see every question as an opportunity to strengthen our relationship. Asking questions always puts clients in a vulnerable spot, and I want to honor that by digging a little deeper.

There have been a few instances where I shared an answer without an explanation. After all, I had the information right in front of me. But I realized I’d missed the mark and just confused my client.

How many times has a client asked you a question, and you gave them a concise answer, only to find they were confused because the client was thinking about something else? It happens all the time.

For example, a client may ask about their RMD, but the value the client wanted was their QCD – they had their terms mixed up – and these values were drastically different.

When you answer questions, make sure everyone in the room is on the same page; start with the 30,000-foot view and work your way down to the details that matter.

I don’t want to belabor a point or start reading tax code, nor do I want to spend 30 minutes answering their question.

But I’ve found that if I can provide some context, I can help my clients understand my answer and where it came from, which is more valuable in the long run than if I simply blurt out a number.

Action Item

Pick one or two of your most common communication points and consider your words.

Think about how you talk about things like RMDs, distributions, Roth conversions, etc., from the lens of your entire clientele relationships.

If every fee your clients could pay you over their lifetime was contingent on this discussion, how would you have this discussion?

How could your messaging be improved?

Matthew Jarvis, CFP®, ChFC, is the co-founder of The Perfect RIA, one of the industry's most recognized advisor training platforms. Just 10 years prior, Jarvis was buried in debt, with a badly struggling practice and a morning routine of trying to figure out how to quit the industry without looking like a failure. Through several turns of fate, Jarvis clawed from near failure to the top of the industry. Today, alongside running his incredibly profitable and successful practice, Jarvis guides other advisors on duplicating his success in their practice.

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