Beverly Flaxington is a practice management consultant. She answers questions from advisors facing human resource issues. To submit yours, email us here.
Advisor Perspectives welcomes guest contributions. The views presented here do not necessarily represent those of Advisor Perspectives.
Dear Bev,
We have many clients who are really wired. They know a lot of wealthy people and many sit on boards and are trustees. Given the level of service we offer, I would expect our clients to proactively introduce us to these folks. Instead, every meeting we ask them for a referral and nothing comes of it. Does this mean we don’t have the great relationships we think we have?
Mark T.
Dear Mark,
Don’t panic about the strength of your relationships just yet! All is probably well. You might just be missing a key point when talking to your clients about who they you know. This is a topic we work with many advisors on. The lack of referrals is especially frustrating here; you know that they know people you should know!
Put yourself in your clients’ shoes. They might enjoy working with you without fully understanding the value you bring. You realize the difference between you and the average advisor, but your clients might only have the experience of working with you. Having nothing to compare it to, they can’t see the “wow!” factor you provide.
In addition, people don’t often think about the situations with which they are most satisfied. Relationships that are imperfect or need fixing demand the most time and attention. When all is well with your clients, they might come in and meet with you and walk out the door without a second thought. This is actually a compliment to you; you aren’t top of mind because you don’t need to be. You are serving them well and taking care of them.
So what are the secret words that will make a difference in getting referrals? It starts with changing your approach. Instead of asking them for general referrals, ask them for specific help. People like to be needed. They respond well to requests for assistance that they can readily give. Start by saying, “I have a problem and would appreciate your thoughts and help. We want to grow our practice. We know we are doing an excellent job serving our clients, but we don’t get the level of referrals and introductions we believe we should. I notice you are connected to (insert the board they are on, the company they work for, the people they know). Would you be able to facilitate an introduction for me?” Stop there. Don’t keep talking. Don’t keep explaining. Most often the response will be positive. Either they will agree to do so or they will offer another option to be helpful to you.
Dear Bev,
We have a disruptive person in our office. This person is negative and condescending. The air changes when they enter the room and other people’s faces drop. I have talked to this person and said that we’re in a tough business. With the volatile markets and client calls, we have more to do than we can fit in one day as is. I explained that we don’t need additional problems from within our office. The conversation didn’t seem to make a difference. The rage and negativity continue. Is there something else I could do or say to better handle this situation?
Chris Q.
Dear Chris,
It’s interesting how much you emphasized what you did or didn’t do. We have to always remember that there are two sides to every exchange and every relationship. You might have done everything “right” but still not seen the changes you were hoping for in this person’s behavior. Humans are complicated beings. Believe me, I know; I have devoted my career to trying to understand them and share that knowledge with others.
This person could just be a negative individual. Some people actually revel in negativity. It gives them something to “wear” that makes them proud and can garner the attention they desperately seek. Others have not learned how to manage their emotions. There could be something going on at home with this person and they are bringing that into your firm every day. Without this person’s open involvement, we are not going to figure out the root of their disruptive behavior.
That said, one very important thing you can do is stop feeling responsible for figuring out how to manage this person. I applaud you for taking the step to speak with them directly. If you did it exactly as you described, it sounds very objective and non-accusatory. If this person were going to be responsive to any such efforts, your approach would have been great.
Probably the most powerful thing you and your coworkers can do now is to ignore this behavior. Be upbeat and positive in spite of it. Refuse to let it drag you down. You were on point; there is enough to worry about in this business and enough negativity in the market. You do not need negativity from within.
Sometimes the best way to get someone to drop their negative behavior is not to address it at all but rather act as if you couldn’t care less!
Good luck!
Beverly Flaxington co-founded The Collaborative, a consulting firm devoted to business building for the financial services industry in 1995. In 2008 she co-founded Advisors Trusted Advisor to offer dedicated practice management resources to advisors, planners, and wealth managers. She is currently an adjunct professor at Suffolk University teaching undergraduate students Leadership & Social Responsibility. Beverly is a Certified Professional Behavioral Analyst (CPBA) and Certified Professional Values Analyst (CPVA).
She has spent over 25 years in the investment industry and has been featured in Selling Power Magazine and quoted in hundreds of media outlets, including the Wall Street Journal, MSNBC.com, Investment News and Solutions Magazine for the FPA. She speaks frequently at investment industry conferences and is a speaker for the CFA Institute.
Read more articles by Beverly Flaxington
