What if I Don’t Want to Grow My Practice?

Dear E.J.,

Your note asks for permission to chart your destiny and determine what goals and what future are right for you. This is an odd request because I can’t validate or deny you your goals!

It sounds as if your firm wants (perhaps needs) you to grow, as most financial advisory firms do. It also sounds like your coach has the same objective, or the coach may have been told by the firm their job is to help you grow. In that case the coach would automatically focus on this area with you. Your note doesn’t indicate why the firm asked you to work with a coach, or perhaps more importantly, who is paying the coach (you or the firm). But this could have a huge impact on how the coach interacts with you.

If your firm believes you need to grow and you do not agree, you need to have a conversation with your branch or complex manager and talk about your goals and objectives. Yours isn’t a popular perspective to take inside a large organization. Most leaders want to see all their advisors focused on growth, especially those who have a good niche and are already running a strong practice. I get that you don’t want to disrupt something you have built, worked hard for, and is going well, but you are in a good position to take on someone new and expand your reach. My guess is this is why your firm is pushing you to find ways to bring on someone new.

I have worked with many advisors who did not want their situation to change. They liked their work/life balance, they did not want to disrupt something that was working. They weren’t interested in putting in more effort than they were already doing by working harder to find and onboard new clients. I once worked with an advisor who ran his business from a boat and had no interest in taking any steps to do things differently; he wanted a coach (me) to help him be more efficient so he could spend even less time on the business than he already was doing.

I don’t judge anyone’s goals or objectives. It’s your life and your practice and if you want to stay with the status quo, that is your prerogative and I’m not going to weigh in and tell you differently.

But I work with a lot of firms like the one you are aligned with. Its mandate is to grow, expand and find ways to bring in new assets and revenues.

Consider whether there could be a way to bring in a new advisor, one who is carefully selected by you and fits your team culturally and philosophically, and have that person focus on growth and finding new revenue. If you create a plan with your coach about how to integrate someone new but maintain the approach you have been taking to manage your clients and your team, you might find there is a way to grow without upsetting all of what you’ve done. I’ve also seen cases where someone new, who is perhaps hungrier and ready to grow, might want to take more off your plate and allow you the time and freedom to pursue other objectives.

I applaud you for knowing what you want and creating a team that works well and is successful. I support you for focusing on the goals that are important to you and for not getting pushed into something that would make you unhappy. Talk with your coach about these concerns and considerations and see if there isn’t a middle ground where you keep what you have but meet the requests of your firm (especially if they are paying for your coach) and for you to grow!

Dear Bev,

My parents run a small, very successful, advisory firm. My mother founded it 12 years ago, and my dad joined her 9 years ago and is currently COO and CFO. I wanted to go the finance route, so I got a bachelors and a masters I nfinance, which I obtained in 5.5 years with very high honors. When I got out of school 3 years ago, I went to work on Wall Street running an institutional desk. I make a lot of money – even though my parent’s firm is very successful, my annual income matches what they are both able to take home after expenses of the firm each year.

The dilemma: My parents are pressuring me to join the firm and be their succession plan. My mother wants to start me off with a salary and bonus tied to how much new business I bring in. The salary is literally 40% of what I make now.

My career has been on the institutional side. I haven’t worked with private clients, nor do I have a strong network outside of the people I know in NYC. My mother thinks this should be fertile ground for me to find new clients and that I can leverage relationships with my colleagues here in NYC.

My father has been silent on all of this. He knows this is likely a bad move for me. I think he is either afraid or defers to my mother if anything has to do with the business. I have two much younger siblings; one is in middle school and one a sophomore in college. The one in college, 11 years younger than me, wants to be an artist and the younger one will probably take my parent’s money at some point and travel the world. He isn’t the most motivated person.

I’m a good daughter. I love my parents and I am very, very proud of what they have built. But I also love my job and I’ve worked hard to get it. I make a lot of money, and I have many friends here in NYC. Relocating to where my parents are (I prefer not to say in case one of them or a contact of theirs reads this) is not in my plans. I am 27 years old and would like the chance to make it on my own.

Am I selfish? How do I love my parents but not want to help them out?

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

I felt your anguish as I read your note, considering what a tough position you are in. I have worked with dozens of family advisory teams and firms and in every single case there are complications. Families, by definition, have their issues that stem from years and years of history together. Just because a business is successful or everyone is making a lot of money, it doesn’t mean those issues go away.

But your situation is harder than those I am used to dealing with because you never wanted to succeed your parents in this business, yet it’s been their plan all along that you would do so. The pressure you are getting to stop a job you love and take so much less money to ensure a legacy for them seems entirely unfair. My daughter works with me, and I don’t believe she would care longer term to take it over. I can’t imagine putting pressure on her or “guilting” her to do so. It’s hard for me to imagine putting this pressure on you.

But in fairness to your mom, I wonder if she realizes you don’t aspire to run this business or (now, anyway) to even work in the business. Have you had an honest conversation with her? In this conversation, you are ideally both objective and non-emotional. You can share your hopes and dreams with her and help her understand that you love her deeply and respect what she has done but you don’t want to follow in her footsteps – at least now.

Keep the door open with your mom because at some point you may decide you do want to join the business. At 27, something you enjoy and want to pursue might be quite different than at 37 or 47. I’m assuming with a child in middle school your parents are not thinking about succession in the near term, so you probably have a few years to consider this.

Talk with your mom honestly and openly. Most parents want what’s best for their children, but sometimes they also want what gets in the way.

To buy a copy of Bev’s book, The Pocket Guide to Sales for Financial Advisors, click here.

Beverly Flaxington co-founded The Collaborative, a consulting firm devoted to business building for the financial services industry, in 1995. The firm also founded and manages the Advisors Sales Academy. The firm has won the Wealthbriefing WealthTech award for Best Training Solution for 2022 and 2023. Beverly is currently an adjunct professor at Suffolk University teaching undergraduate and graduate students Entrepreneurship and Leading Teams. She is a Certified Professional Behavioral Analyst (CPBA) and Certified Professional Values Analyst (CPVA).

She has spent over 25 years in the investment industry and has been featured in Selling Power Magazine and quoted in hundreds of media outlets, including The Wall Street Journal, MSNBC.com, Investment News and Solutions Magazine for the FPA. She speaks frequently at investment industry conferences and is a speaker for the CFA Institute.

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